Christmas Baking and Sweet Memories

I can’t help but notice how many people are posting on social media,

commenting on and relating food with the holidays and that being such a big focus. In those comments so many have also mentioned the memories of the family members who brought a special dish or square.

I made a decision a few years ago to only bake what my family likes at Christmas and you know what? It’s a short list... so baking has really fallen by the wayside for me!

I used to bake it all. The butter tarts, sugar cookies, shortbread, Carmel squares, etc... and really I was the one who ate them. I was baking for me. Once I made that realization changing things up was easier!

So much of baking was about the memories of who brought them or with baking with my mom, grammas and aunties. About this time of year I get very nostalgic, I consciously remember specifics about those times.

My parents are gone and parts of this are difficult, painful and grief filled but the memories are so sweet and deserve to be in my present life as well.

I didn’t allow them for so long ... I ate them instead. No matter how deep that grief may still be and how challenging engaging with them may be, I choose the memories now and the joy that they bring! It’s been so fun to dig through some old pictures and to take some time for the days passed.

This Christmas has the potential to be very different... and the thought of that is challenging as well. As I focus on memories of recent and passed And look to this year I have some angst! Are we going to be able to be together... what about the food? The traditions? The presents? The fear? The restrictions? How are you feeling about all of this? How does food and your use of it to deal with emotion play into that? Where do the memories(good and bad) fit in?

This is such a heavy time leading up to this Christmas season. I know that I don’t want to deal with all of it anymore... I’m just exhausted by it...

what about you? How are you doing with all of these kind of thing? And what kind of coping strategies are you employing?

I have decided that I am baking this year! Not a bunch and I am going to modify all my old favourites and make them work for me to be able to enjoy! And as I bake I will be much more focused on the people and wonderful times I associate wit that baking... not so much on the food itself.

I have also decided that I am going to embrace harmony, grace, self care, accountability and perseverance. And I above all going to focus on the real reason for the season. Celebrating the birth of Jesus.